3MF

Sweeney Todd! The Movie

I just read that Dreamworks is working on a movie version of Sweeney Todd. I'm surprised that the movie studios are still trying musicals considering none have duplicated the success of Chicago. Even more interesting is the fact that Tim Burton is directing and Johnny Depp is set to star as the titular character. I wonder how that will turn out.

Thirty-six rings

School starts tomorrow and i'm really looking forward to it. To celebrate, i went out and purchased a twelve pack of three-ring binders. Nothing gets me in the mood for learnin' like the smell of fresh office supplies. I'm ready for the work. I'm ready to punch tiny holes all over it. Bring it on!

More fine print

Here's another round of fine print from the back of our improv show's program. Again, i tried to collect as many warning labels as i could find an twist them to fit the show.

Performers are subject to participation and availability. If you break it you buy it. When in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, please do so after the show. Prices may be higher in Hawaii, Alaska, and Delaware. Four out of five dentists have dogs. In case of a sudden loss of cabin pressure oxygen masks will fall from the ceiling. Be sure to put your own mask on first, then, if you think of it, help out the youngsters. Friends don't let friends give bad suggestions. Objects in rearview mirror are closer than they may appear. The contents of this show are under extreme pressure. Explosion may occur at high altitudes. The show is not to be used above 8,000 feet. Possession of rotten tomatoes will result in a $4,000 fine, and you will be placed on 5 month produce probation. No shoes, no shirt, no service, no verbs. Stop use if rash or irritation develops. Artificial weather will be utilized during portions of the show. Weather patterns may include: drizzle, partly cloudy skies, tornadic sunlight, breezes of a brisk nature, pseudo-monsoon with a chance of some sort of niño. Patent Pending. The contents of this performance may be HOT. Use caution when handling. Do not point directly into your eye. This show passes all California emission standards. Hot casings will be ejected from the side. Side affects may include: spontaneous laughter, lacrimal secretion, patellar striking, nasal lactation, and dyspepsia. Us will not tolerate those whom use pronouns incorrectly. The views expressed during this performance do not necessarily reflect the views of anyone else on earth or its affiliated planets and moons. Do not be alarmed if you hear a rattling sound as you move the show. Nothing is loose, It's a special component inside each performance. This show may not cause harmful interference and must accept any interference received, including interference that may cause undesired operation.

The one that makes me giggle the most is only probably amusing to those who have owned a Nemesis Factor.

Big wheel keep on churning

I'm a fan of the Breyer's Double Churned Chocolate Ice Cream. I can't wait until those food wizards figure out how to crank that cream a third time. I bet it just keeps getting more and more delicious.

Fall semester reading

Fall semester is about to begin. I picked up my books this week. I do get to recycle one book from last semester so that's nice. One class doesn't have a book. Normally, that would be OK, but the class is Advanced Calc so i'm a bit worried. This set of books cast $27.34 per pound.

This semester i'll be reading Operations Research for a class by the same name; Mathematical Statistics With Applications as well as Stats Labs for STA-412; Mathematics for High School Teachers and Journey Through Genius for my math capstone class; and finally, The Norton Book of Nature Writing and A Sand County Almanac for The Idea of Nature.

Fine Print

I was going though my old files on my computer and i came across some of programs i made for my old improv team that we would hand out before the show. Occasionally i would fill the back side with a bunch of "fine print" when i didn't know what else to put there. For some reason i find fake legal disclaimers amusing. Here's the back from the first program i decorated with tiny text.

The team cannot be held responsible for jokes which are not funny. If you are not at least 34 inches tall, you may not be able to laugh at all the jokes. Sorry, no refunds after the first 3 minutes. A receipt is required to receive cash back. MasterCard is accepted everywhere but here. We reserve the right to coat the audience in a synthetic pie-filling-like substance for the safety of the actors. Flash photography is strongly encouraged during this evenings performance. Please do not feed the performers. The comedy produced during the show cannot be exported to any foreign country with out the expressed written permission of the NFL. Sometimes I sneak into your room at night and watch you sleep. If you do not own a Macintosh computer, you will have to reboot your machine during intermission. This team does not discriminate based on gender, race, age, height, beauty or ability but we do proudly discriminate against lacks of senses of humor and bad suggestions. All laughs during the program become property of Part Of A Complete Breakfast Industries and it's affiliates. All of the characters and events portrayed during the performance are fictional. Any similarity to persons alive or dead is coincidental. Any similarities to your mom are intentional and funny. Your satisfaction with our humor is guaranteed. This performance may contain nuts. For more information call 1-800-PROGRESSIVE; they won't be able to tell you much about the team, but they can give you a great deal on car insurance. Emergency exits are located just below the exit signs. Your chair can be used as a flotation device in case of a flash flood. Snacks will not be served during this show. If you have a complaint, please tell someone who cares. No portion of this evenings ticket sales is going to charity. Offer only valid while supplies last. For a free game piece, please send a SASE (self addressed stamped envelope) to Part Of A Complete Breakfast, PO Box 1485, Lake Beauna Vista, FL, 04826-1485. Please let the team know if you have any severe allergies or are talking any medications. We've changed our mind about the cameras: no flash photography. You must be present to win. Caution: Strobe lights may be used in this evenings performance. If you are happy and you know it; clap your hands. Please do not take any fruit or seeds with you into the theater. This show is dedicated to the many gifted improvisers who gave their life trying to find the funny.

YouTube tunes

When i get bored, i still like to scavenge through the YouTube repository. On a recent excavation, i uncovered some amusing music videos. The first is a truly geeky math love song called Finite Simple Group (of Order Two). It wasn't until just last semester that i learned the math to get some of the jokes. The second is from a 1989 movie called Teen Witch. The clip is from a song i can only guess is called Top That. I must have caught it on television at some point and how for years have had the phrase "i don't give a *ugh* about trying to top that" stuck in my head. Now you too can watch this disaster of a rap scene as well. The last clip is a song and dance medley from a made for tv movie called High School Musical. It was on the Disney Channel, and, since i don't get that one, i've never actually seen it. However, thanks to all the videos posted of it on YouTube, i feel like i have. Here you can see some U of M students singing and dancing to their favorite songs.

Your vote really counts

I was watching the local voting results scroll along the bottom of my screen when i noticed this...

It says "102% Precincts Reporting." I know i voted 1.6 times; apparently others did as well.

Reading the question aload

My sister is certified by the National Athletic Traniner's Association (NATA). As part of her certification, she must earn so many "points" to keep her membership active. One of the ways she can earn points is by volunteering to help during regional NATA certification exams. She went to today's exam as the human subject for the practical part of the exam. Students placed stickers on her body near the anatomical position identified by the exam administrator and dressed her fake wounds.

I got in on the action as well. They also needed people to read the written part of the exam aloud to students requesting assistance under the American with Disabilities Act (ADA). I was a bit nervous because i knew there would be quite a bit of medical terminology on the exam. I had my sister help me on my pronunciations before the exam started. The word i hated saying the most was spondylolisthesis. The phrase i most enjoyed was gertie's tubercle which is apparently part of the knee. I took a few hours to get through the 150 question exam but i got paid for my time there and they gave us a free lunch.

I had no clue what most of the answers were on the exam -- apparently neither do most of the students. Only about 17% of the people who take the exam pass all three parts (written, practical, and simulation) on their first attempt. I was surprised at how many of the questions involved organizational-type questions such as who has authority in certain situations (i.e. the athletic director, team physician, athletic trainer, referee, etc). There were also questions about liability, confidentiality and all that other boring legal stuff. It's a shame that administrative stuff has become just as important as the medical training.

Back to chatting

Way back when when i first got online, i used to spend time playing around with IRC. If i'm not mistaken i started off using Netscape Chat. I was quickly chided for my choice of client until i switched to mIRC. I don't think i've tuned into an IRC channel since 1998.

That is, until i started playing around with chatting this week. I needed a new client for my Mac and i found Colloquy to be one of the better looking clients that runs on OS X (plus it's open-source and free). I did all this to gain access to the #macdev channel on irc.freenode.net. Sometimes my Google skills fail and i just want to ask someone a question; now i can. Plus, i'm all caught up on how to get answers so i should be all set.

The day my iPod died

This morning i went to grab my iPod to take to school and it felt unusually hot. I was greeted by the following icons.

I tried resetting and restoring but nothing has seemed to bring it back to life. Looks like my iPod has sung it's last song. It will probably be a while before i have a real job again and can afford a replacement. Oh well.

My iPod: Aug 2002 - Aug 2006.